Spud Aficionado T-Shirts

'Ben's disappointed. He thought it said 'stud'.' (Ed's Spud Farm).

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

Soup of the month.

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

'But Mom, I like potatoes in their jackets.'

"Where's all your fish?" "I never should have bought 'coy' fish."

"Tell them we only have romaine!"

'Six different chefs in six months and they still can't make a decent broth!'

"I feel like I'm cosplaying as a salad bar."

The Inexperienced Cook

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"What!?! I like a nice salad every now and then, too. What of it?"

Chef picking salad leaves from a hanging basket outside his restaurant.

"I just explained 'kugel' to him."

"Losing your fizz is very common for a man your age."

"We're out of today's soup, but you can have tomorrow's soup from yesterday which is the same as today's."

'Right you lot, listen. Hands up for soup. . .'

'You've never planted potatoes before have you?'

Mash-Test Dummies.

'It's hard to slice a potato once you've looked it in the eye.'

I knew from the starch we were a perfect mash.

The beer idea.

'Ooh girl, he may look like a potato, but he moves like a yam!'

'Potatoes. How many would I need to make a bottle of vodka?'

'Of course you can't have the chef's salad. What will the chef eat?'

Alphabet Soup: Now in a bold new font.

'My husband's just getting some ready to show you.'

'Are you sure you washed this salad?'

'Maybe you should try flowers?'

"It's a fantastic character reference..."

'Your iceberg salad, Captain!'

'Perhaps monsieur found the Vichyssoise 'crunchy' because the soup bowl was not edible.'