Sporty Friend Pillows

"Are we just going to run suicides again all day?"

'Kevin, I'm sorry for losing my temper on the eighteenth. Ah I see they removed the flag alright.'

Tricky Shot.

'Did you know golf is the healthiest sport you can play?'

Swing by won't you?

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

"I can't decide. I'm having a brand identity crisis."

You were warned about mixed marriages.

The Other Cooperstown

'Wait! Let's see if he gets up on his own.'

'Remember last Saturday. . . you were bold that day. No dear, caught.'

'The grudge match.'

Cinderella insisted on always having glass slippers - even into old age...

"Have I ever told you how sexy you look when you sit through overtime?"

'It was great seeing you again Terry, we must do wildebeest sometime.'

'I've met you before...I'm not good with names, but I never forget a pace!'

"I guess exercise will make me feel more energetic, but I feel like I'm wasting all my energy exercising!"

"Oh I don't mind the jogging, but I think you tricked me. When you asked if I wanted to exercise, I thought you said, extra fries!"

'It's one of the less well known about dangers of a sedentary lifestyle!'

"Things that make me feel better/Things I'm too tired to do......Things that make me feel worse/Things I do when I'm tired.

I think it's time to retire from boxing. I'm too old for life in the fist lane.

Dog Weightlifting

'Wouldn't it be easier if we just got more heavier friends?'

"It's just that they usually ask for their ASHES to be scattered!"

Dog football

'I think I am in love dad - she even understands the offside rule.'

'I realize this is an advances aerobics class, but I still don't think we're ready to work out to 'Flight of the Bumble Bee'!'

Baseball Angels

"Let me help you, dear."

"If only legginess were based on circumference."

'You have to employ me. . . I may be 17 but my wii fitness age is 62.'

Abraham sacrifices Isaac

Moose is an environmental nightmare, Nana. I beg your pardon? The beef and cereal in his chow is worth 10,000 SUV miles. But consider his offsets. He cleans my floor with natural solvents. I don't need a power-sucking burglar alarm. He listens to all my problems, free of charge. And he saves me from having to join a gym. SO ... I am not ... reducing my canine footprint.

Happy new year, Ernie! Happy new year, Frank! This year I'm going to eat a healthy diet. Okay. I'm going to exercise more. Uh-huh. I'm going to get organized. Right. At least until Thursday or so. Then what? I'll resolve to leave well enough alone!

'You're pregnant?'