Sports Technician Gifts

Formula One Therapy

'OK, everybody, calm down,,,'

A man is trying to play golf with a football boot attached to a stick.

Football

'Oh, and this ringtone is an app that alerts me when a fly ball is headed my way.'

'We need you to get onto those high balls coming over'

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

National Academy of Sport

"This round, forget the finesse. Hit him."

'We're doing the right thing, Bob, Let Andy solve problems with bullies at school his own way,,,'

'You know our track team stinks when our star pole vaulter is better at the limbo.'

"When you put on the uniform, you surrender a part of yourself."

"Fellas, I invited Max here to give us a fresh, millennial take on how to get out of the inning."

'Get him in a full nelson, you dolt! You'll never pin him with a Heimlich maneuver!'

'...and if you guys keep screwing up, I'm gonna have to start kicking some butt!'

'The score is tied and we've only got a 20-second timeout, so we've gotta be quick. ... I'm 'X'. Who wants to be 'O'?'

'Well, there's another strikeout. ... get that bat company on the phone. I'm having second thoughts about their so-called 'volume discount.''

Taking control of his opponent, Darren quickly slapped some deodorant on him.

NFL linebackers are identified in early infancy and sent away to the secret academy until puberty.

'There goes Finley...turning pro.'

"The hardest thing about learning to tumble is the floor."

'He has some unresolved issues.'

'Is Hamburger Helper on the Olympics' banned substance list?'

"Steroids."

'How do you expect to play Canasta when you left your brain to science?'

At spring training.

'Ring around the rosey ...'

Injured player

'Please open your mouth and say '68, 56, 87, ..'

Jack's: clubs straightened, balls retrieved

'Of course the swing is important, just don't allow it to pull focus from the neck.'

Dexter Miller developed the talking golf ball to call out when lost in the rough, but... (golf ball in pain)

'So I told the doctor I'm a major league baseball player and I don't have any time to get out in the sunshine.'

"I know I told you to fool him into thinking you've got nothing left, but now you've got me convinced."

Making sure the pitcher is up for the job.