Sports Rivalry Enthusiasts Gifts

Spectators at a coliseum

"After fourteen straight draws it seemed like the only decent way to settle who was the best."

I like the Jets...I guess

I only root so hard for my time because I hate your team so much.

Xena: Warrior Princess, TV star, professional volleyball player.

You were warned about mixed marriages.

"It's World Cup Soccer, Tia Carmen. The U.S. vs England."

Tic-tac-toe

'We have to forfeit, Three of our players got squashed on the way over here,'

So far the coaching exchange program was hitting a few snags.

COWS: Cow Pong

In addition to brilliant grades and perfect SATs � Parents' night. College admissions. Your child should excel at 3 sports and lead a school extra-curricular like the newspaper. Don't the arts count? Sure! If your child sings, for example � A part on 'Glee' or in the Metropolitan Opera would certainly help. Our kids are doomed.

"Yes! I hit a triple. Woo-hoo."

Get back in that locker room! Go on - scat! ... Anyone else forget to wash his hands?'

'What makes you think we'll lose today?'

'To talk to men at their own level you have to talk a load of balls.'

Soccer games took on a whole new meaning for the parents of Hillsdale Youth Soccer.

'I don't even care about the score, catty. I just enjoy the long walk.'

'Okay, men, let's go out and win one for the flipper.'

Next Wave Collegiate Sports

"Just being proactive."

David and Goliath.

"...And don't give me that 'I hope his precious little Blackhawks lose' look either!"

"I guess there ain't room in this town for two bonsai specialists."

'As your doctor, I'd strongly advise that you not laugh at your wife when you beat her at tennis!'

Psychiatrist to man dressed in baseball jersey: 'You've never gotten over the fact your father wouldn't play catch with you?'

'The blond guy is a forward and the other guy is a wing.'

"Yin and Yankee fan"

"That Melinda Alvarez thinks she's so smart! Well, I've been studying, and I'm gonna teach her a lesson on the test we have today!"

"I can't shake the feeling there's always someone looking over my shoulder."

'I warned him about watching the game at the opposition's pub.'

NFL linebackers are identified in early infancy and sent away to the secret academy until puberty.

'Glen Hoddle employs faith healer' "Remember the days we only had a magic sponge?"

"I'm here to gets the gold"

"Don't hit him too hard, his little old mum's at the ringside!"