Sports Joke Appreciator Pillows

'I've got a good idea to improve the team.'

'Did you want to bring on a sub'

"...so it appears we were talking to his butt that entire time."

'Let's go over our secret play.'

Laughing Zone Ahead

"So I'm perfectly healthy? That's good but will I still be able to research symptoms online and panic?"

"You'll feel a pinch and then a burn."

'Did you really mean both me and a hippopotamus evolved from a tiny blob in the ocean?'

"I think you should be aware that the chef is a summer intern."

'Excuse me, I ordered Matzo Ball soup.'

'HEY! Shouldn't that be a reef-knot?!'

"Have you had a stressful experience lately, such as an accident?"

'I'm counter - intelligence'

'The guy at the end of the bar, would like to know if he can get you to buy him another drink?'

"I'll tell you my diagnosis if you promise not to laugh."

"...you mean this is the end of the 3 bandidoes?"

'...and watch out for his 'flipper'!'

'Cycle shop' selling puncture repair kits next door to a 'Sex shop' selling inflatable dolls

'He's a bit confused after that last round.'

'Where's my horse?'

"I had a consultation with a plastic surgeon. Now I have to decide whether I want to look old or look weird."

Rest in Peace Instant Replay

"...and the dung was this big!.... No...elephant, actually."

'This isn't Armageddon... it's a bar brawl on a Saturday night. Let Pestilence read the map.'

Medicine bottle - If symptoms persist, die!

"Calm down! That was a massive fart, NOT a sneeze!"

Due to Global Warming Penguins have been Spotted Far from their Natural Habitat

"You are aware that’s a golf ball?"

OMG.

'...Oh yeah? Well I've never heard of the 'denture fairy'.'

'I'd probably do a lot better if the teachers weren't set to 'auto-correct.''

Team medic spraying deodorant