Sports Day Humorist Pillows

"I'm afraid I'm kind of a klutz."

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

Punt Cake

Football Chameleon

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

'Yes! The momentum's going to shift now. Our home fan is starting to make some noise!'

A man is trying to play golf with a football boot attached to a stick.

Alternative fielding positions

The Golfing Accident

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

Trojan Hurdler.

'Let's throw ball. Running game not working.'

United Football Club: In, Out, VAR.

'There! See that? Brad just happens to morph into some kind of hideous amphibian just as he's about to putt? Now tell me she's not cheating!'

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

"Pastrami. My favorite, Chad. But I asked for the 'sand wedge.'"

'Clear out your desk, Randy. ...NEXT!'

'We went generic. The players' salaries are affordable.'

'I got a reverse hat trick. I let three goals in.'

Cricket - The Pride of the Village.

'Why do they call him Neckline Ned.' - 'He's always plunging down the middle but never showing anything.'

Volcano Sacrifice Competition

'I reckon we need a new sweeper.'

"You may inflict pain, but it mustn't be severe or prolonged."

Beijing Olympics - Treadmill.

Major Bunker (who has been persuaded to join in a game of hockey for the first time, absent-mindedly preparing to drive). 'Force.'

'Sean Connery was the best James Bond!'

Tennis ball girl.