Sports Critic Pillows

'I just find women playing rugby so unladylike.'

'I don't want to mention any names, but one of you isn't giving 100% out there.'

The Qatar Baby

'Thank goodness those bloody games are over. Maybe now they'll put something decent on the telly.'

'Touch me and I'll see you in Strasbourg.'

'OK, footballers are not worth their millions - how much would YOU pay to watch someone do YOUR job?'

'We're sending you down, Hartnett. You need to work on your scratching and spitting.'

"This part of the match was fixed...errr....sponsered by..."

American Football Referee Controversy.

"These drugs in sports are tearing the game apart."

FIFA

Money in Football

The True Achievers.

Doping

Novak Djokovic

Djokovic

"Really? They're now giving out non-participation trophies?"

'What the... Oh, lucky me - it's just something easy to get rid of!'

Watching Human Rights through Jacques Rogge's glasses.

'The selectors must be meeting...'

'Call 911! He watched 12 straight hours of football without training adequately.'

"If you ask me, he's too damn cocky!"

'Getting rid of Lance Armstrong is a shot in the arm for cycling. . .If I may rephrase that. . .'

Maybe we should stop calling it 'The Masters.'

'F.Y.I guys! The Commonwealth Games facilities...A-MAZING!'

'You may be wondering what a sex scandal has to do with managing the national team...'

'You're a great player, Coleman, but you've got a bad attitude. One of these days someone's gonna knick that big cow chop off your shoulder.'

Perhaps the word 'sports' is too comprehensive.

Paterno State.

'Brilliant! Fouling, diving, spitting, expelling his nasal gunge - all in one beautiful action!'