Sports Comedy Buff Pillows

'Justin hacked another divot... Rub his nose in it or he'll never learn.'

"Is that my skirt?!!"

'Just putt the dang ball, already!'

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

Punt Cake

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

Football Chameleon

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

'Why couldn't you throw like that in the game?'

Alternative fielding positions

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

Trojan Hurdler.

'Best save I've ever seen.'

'He's gonna dunk on me. I just know it.'

'We went generic. The players' salaries are affordable.'

'Clear out your desk, Randy. ...NEXT!'

'I got a reverse hat trick. I let three goals in.'

"Pastrami. My favorite, Chad. But I asked for the 'sand wedge.'"

Cricket - The Pride of the Village.

'Why do they call him Neckline Ned.' - 'He's always plunging down the middle but never showing anything.'

'I reckon we need a new sweeper.'

'Sean Connery was the best James Bond!'

The best goalie in the world!

'...and watch out for his 'flipper'!'

"Lord Stanley's Cup...and Bailey"

Small country advertisng at the Olympics

Various men worshipping a statue of a football

'It looks suspiciously like Killer Hart is taking a dive!'