Sports Banter Lovers Pillows

'We had no choice, ump. Their pitcher threw a brushback, and so we retaliated with a burshback...'

The best goalie in the world!

"Why so aloof in here? When you're on base, you yak your ass off with every Yankee in sight."

Pole Vault Rules

Ok, ok, maybe you guys are right - maybe I do have a concussion.

'We've conducted a chemical analysis of the beef in hot dogs, and we've determined, Mr Ruth, you are guilty of steroid enhancement.'

'When you said, Dream Team, I thought you meant the Swiss Bikini Team.'

Footballer holding team mates bum while preparing for a penalty shoot out

Golfers forming the raising the flag on Iwo Jima.

The locker room door suddenly swings open, and Randy is busted by a steroid-sniffing dog.

"Listen, I've had 25 fights and won all but 24 of them."

'...And Timmy, as usual, will guard goal.'

Captain Ahab and Moby Dick in Retirement

'In this...um...part of the circle...'

Dominique Valera - The King/Cat

Jack Nicholas - Sun-Visor

The only drug this league tests positive for is Geritol.

"Sweetie, I know we missed Princesses on Ice, but I'm going to make it up to you."

'Thank you for calling the bullpen,,, To continue in English, Press one,,,'

"Who are you looking at? Want to kick off, do you?"

'I'm so embarrassed I'll never be able to hold up my head again.'

"You mock, sir—you mock a sport storied and beloved. I, sir, pity you."

'Must be that new 3D football.'

'Listen,kid, you're going to have to lower your standards if you ever want to throw the sleazeball.'

'Let's practice lobs again.'

Gotta babysit. Too bad! Tap tap. The worst part is the first! Subduing little monsters? Tap tap. No

'I said shag carpeting.'

Old basketball players never die. . . they just pick and roll.

'Oh, great. Leonard's got quarterback on his jersey. No amount of bleach is going to get THAT out.'

'Oh, dude. Maybe the electronics store has a, throws like a little girl return policy.'

'Time out! Fish on!'

"My handicap? I'm a poor loser."

'I believe you want some fencing done at the bottom of your garden?'

Sportsmen rowers overtaken by the Owl and the Pussycat

I never realized what a bad golfer I was until somebody else kept score. Club House.