Sporting Event Junkie Gifts

"I just realized that unless I'm riding for some cause, I must look like an idiot."

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

'Just how big of a tailgate party are you expecting to have?'

Even good cholesterol can develop an unhealthy sports addiction...

'And at what stage did you realise the ball you were heading was on the TV?'

"I can't decide who gets the promotion, so we'll settle it with a rope toy Tug O' War."

"You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!"

"This is his fifteenth successive Olympics."

Pentagon Science Contest: '...It's a contest by the pentagon. They're gonna pay out half a million bucks to someone who comes up with the best idea on how people could travel to another solar system.'

Extra Long-jump

Isn't there something about this in th Geneva Convention

"Is it me or are the obstacle courses getting harder?"

"I think feeling a certain amount of anxiety over the up coming race with the Hare is perfectly normal!"

'No, no, no...kick the ball into touch! The ball!'

'You've got to give her points for originality.'

...Another second closer to kick-off....another second..

'I think they're still just sizing each other up.'

Cheetah in at the start of a race, thinking: 'Why do I have to keep proving myself?'

Bernard Hinault

The Knockout.

Sergio Aguero

'These things always taste better at the ballpark.'

'Free food. Free place to sleep. And now we get to see a Cubs game - all comp! This is the freakin' life, Louie!'

"I thought they decided who was the best team last year?"

"Ignore the 45,000 people. They're watching you, but they're not staring at you."

Mountain Firefighter Rescue.

'I think they're targeting me!'

'They're always moaning that they cant' tell which way my thumb is so I had this made.'

'Pickpocket is an outside bet...left purse on bus is favourite!' (Security at the races on the phone over a reported missing purse).

"You need to take a break from watching too many tennis matches."