Sporting Comic Fan Gifts

Dog playing tennis with mouse instead of tennis ball.

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

Hell Separates Real Madrid and Barcelona fans.

'Here we go again...'

"We would have won if it hadn't been for the other team."

Footballer kicking his own brain.

The Cricketer and the Golfer

'Don't get up. ... I've got it!'

'Five seconds! ...Four ...Three ...Two ...One ...SPRING!!'

'Focus! Focus! You've just gotta' forget about their home ground advantage.

"Cricket...six minutes of excitement crammed into six hours!"

Golf escape.

"Twenty seven shots, first hole. I think we'll call that a dodo."

"Oh, come on ref. How can you not see that?!"

'The Ref gave out 4 yellow cards, 2 reds and 7 Valentine cards.'

They called her the Olympic Flame because she never went out.

'Will you lean on the other post for awhile, please?.'

"I feel like I play better on clay."

'Wanna play? We need another body... er... one more player.'

'While Dewey distracts the defense, the quarterback simply jogs into the end zone untouched.'

C'mon, give him the old 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8 combo.

Modern Football

Egads. I've forgotten what the rule is about a runner throwing a leg to base ahead of himself.

False starts.

"Stay back. I don't know what he's got, but I'm afraid it's catching."

'I know Joe's sight isn't all that but the captain's not going to like it.'

'Time is running out - shoot! Everyone is starting to keel over and die!!'

'CSI: Basketball.'

"OK maybe we should try a different sport."

Ernie spins the expert's analysis of his boxing skills. He noted that I have great footwork! No, he said you're always "running for your life." I was praised for my courage, never "ducking" an opponent. He meant you're easy to hit. I'm most proud of being described as an artist in the ring. BAM. Actually, he said Ernie "spends a lot of time on the canvas."

Football anagrams(Did vain goal.). Answer: David Ginola.

Sports update: Some teams won and some teams lost.

"One More Swing."

"Your fastball is just hanging and your curve isn't breaking at all. What you should do is take an analgesic with some pain-relieving anti-inflammatory ingredients for a few days."

Brazil vs Germany