Spooky Tales Collector T-Shirts

"Oh there, you are - I just spent three hours talking to a sheet draped over a chair."

"Do you live nearby by any chance? I hate to eat in public."

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

Fairy Library - Frontispiece to Jack and the Beanstalk

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

"That's her - that's the girl who broke into our house! But her hair was 'goldier'."

"I'm spooked - they don't want candy, they want ice water!"

"It's such a beautiful day. Why don't we go out and get someone to eat?"

"It's a cow thing. You wouldn't understand."

'I'm the ghost of Christmas future. I'm hammered, can we do this later...?'

Wicca Heritage Centre: Hansel and Gretel stayed here.

Fairy Library - Cinderella Marries the Prince

"Toadstool you say? No, this is snailstool now!"

"Define fair."

7 More Dwarfs

Rapunzcow

"Once, I tried to change the laces, and the Landmarks Commission came down on me like a ton of bricks."

Fairy Library - Hop o' my Thumb Title Page

"One blackbird pizza?"

Alice in Wonderland - Alice Meets the Cheshire Cat.

"I forgive you, Bumpty."

"I know we're not supposed to invite them over the threshold dear, but it seemed awfully rude to leave him standing on the doorstep."

"And then the three bears were slowly forced out of the neighborhood due to major corporations cornering the market—The once cozy cottage is now an Air B&B." "The end."

"When they assured me the solar panels would look like crackers, I said "What the hell!"'

"I hate to spoil your porridge, but your son has a blonde in his room."

'I can't believe this: We spend all our time hiding from humans, but they keep on publishing stories about us anyway...'

Poems to Spookify

William Tell in his younger years.

"Must go now Zelda. The builders have just arrived"

'I've been knocking for ages!'

'If you cut back on children, at least try to eat them before they nibble on your house.'

A headless man puts up a poster for his lost head.

Scary Marshmallow Campfire Stories.