Spiritual Sparker Gifts

'Get an afterlife!'

"Good game."

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

"Could you go back to the front desk? The receptionist has some forms for you to fill out."

"This next one is called 'The Sermon on the Mount.'"

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

"Ooh, ooh, I know this koan! I got it! Pick me! Pick me!"

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

"Oh, great - They changed the Meaning of Life again."

"Trust me Jesus, if you want to make a bigger impact work on being seeker friendly."

"Home depot."

'Enlightenment isn't EITHER overrated!'

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

'I'm just not sure how much more I can teach you.'

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

'Don't just sit there thinking. Meditate.'

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

'The meaning of life is dog food.'

"Needs to get a life"

"All we have left is standing room only."

A daily rubdown with a beard brush will wrangle awkward bristles and train them downwards...

Zenemies.

My God, I need to fart.

"Nature speaks to me of God’s presence, yet God is a total stranger to the restless world of men." "Why the #!@* is there no signal?!"

'A sitcom has to be quirky or formulaic. There is no middle way.'

"Then one day, as I caught a tennis ball in midair, I asked myself, 'Is this all there is?'"

Unguided imagery

A man deflates and dissolves into the ground and becomes a flower.