Spirit Of The Party Pillows

"I'm the black sheep of the family because I'm afraid of the dark."

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

'No standing while room is in motion.'

'I like you, you remind me of someone.'

Balancing two espresso martinis

That party went well.

"I am so attracted to you right now."

The devil you know and his plus one

Beers

Shaken not stirred

Sally woke up with a headache. This house didn't look familiar. There was a rug burn on her forehead. Three good reasons to quit drinking.

"Tracey, this is Gene. He also read the Nancy Reagan book in unbound galleys."

"As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from restless dreams, transformed into a monstrous vermin, he thought to himself: never again bourbon and tequila in the same night, and this time, I mean it."

'No thanks, I don't drink when I'm driving home a point about investing.'

Cut out and keep your own DJ.

"Honey, I think that's too many bows."

"Whine and cheezed party."

"Honestly sometimes I'd like to pretend I don't know you!"

The Happiest Hen in Acle

'We're the first film ever in HD 3-D DOUBLE D!'

Why weren't we born rich instead of beautiful?

"Come to our microbrew party Saturday. It's B.Y.O.B. — Bring Your Own Brewery."

Is your glass half full or half empty? Who cares, fill her up!

'Just look at him- a fool and his money are soon partying!'

'To make sure I get noticed I always talk in a big bold typeface.'

'Inside Ralph is a comedienne crying to get out.'

"I write mostly confessional non-fiction."

EXTROVERTS ANONYMOUS

Whale Piñata.

Elderly People

"Why can't you ever relax at parties?"

"My feeling is that while we should have the deepest respect for reality, we should not let it control our lives."

Angry wife: 'Oh well DONE Keith! Why didn't you tell me the invite said BRING your own spirits?!'