Spine Savior T-Shirts

'Try to relax.'

'Fetch.'

Insect extinction

"Is this about your raise?"

S.O.S. vaccine

~ S.O.S.

'Hurry, it's having a nervous breakdown!'

"The hardest thing about learning to tumble is the floor."

Shoe Repair and Pest Control.

"Dad don't you think we should do something about mass extinction of species?"

"Have you tried turning it off and on?"

"Young man, don't you ever add pepper to my soup again!"

'Did I put the recycling out?'

"Can i get a transfer from the porcupine enclosure..?

Vaccine

Seal hunters cutting a hole in the ice, while a seal cuts a hole around the hunters.

But who care for these poor little seal pups if I don't?

'First you fetch their slippers and then you chew them up -- it's called the 'good dog-bad dog' system.'

"I'm worried about him - he's praying to Mrs. Butterworth."

'I've tried everything. My skin is still as dry as an elephant's trunk.'

'Urgent customer announcement. Is there an EPOS systems programmer in the shop?'

"....We take the slugs into the countryside and release them."

"There we go. How’d that feel, Frank? … Frank? … Mr. Blume? Oh, no."

"People are always discriminating against my dad. At work, people say, 'clean up that spill' and 'get under the sink.'"

"Can Eddie come out and throw his goddam back out?"

Drought.

The World's Toilet.

Blue screen of death

'Adjustment of your picture is necessary - call your repairman.'

"The only calls not dropped are to your tech support."

Successful in ending the seal hunt, Senator Mac Harb is abducted by a grateful herd and spirited away to a small island.

Maybe it ain't so manly, like ya say, but this here stadium seat sure has saved my back.

I haven't seen Uncle Mort lately. Are you serious? How could you miss him? Ever since Youtube started demonetizing channels left and right, it's been driving independent content creators out of business. Your uncle's out front trying to get people to sign a petition to save his favorite show. "Oatmeal News" told us what the incontinence industry didn't want us to hear about staying regular!

'My chiropractor has made me feel so good, I thought it was time I got rid of my pills.'

Fernmont Chiropractic's new spinal-column bridge made going to the chiropractor much more fun.