Spending Savants Pillows

You're always trying to get more interest from your money? I'm always interested in it.

'Just look at him- a fool and his money are soon partying!'

'Whoever stole your credit card is spending a lot less with it than you did!'

'I've got the world by the tail. How much is this going to set me back?'

"I don't mind out of control spending as long as it's on stuff I like."

'Turn we women loose in the malls - that'll stimulate the economy.'

Piggy Bank ATM

Buy 1 Get 1 Free. Buy 2 You're Stupid.

"Why does your men's clothing store need a loan?" "During the pandemic sales of pants have dropped way off."

Wealth AcquisitionWealth ManagementSince You Can't Take it with you, Spend it.

"Fiscal conservatism be damned. I'm a fiscal hedonist."

'The forever stamps I purchased at 42 cents are now 44 cents. That's an annual apprciation of 2 which is more than you earned on your investment portfolio.'

"With this app, I can track my savings. It counts cash, categorizes cash, and calculates cash interest."

'Spending and consuming - that's my kind of patriotism.'

'Just because I'm a doctor without borders doesn't mean I venture into menus without prices.'

'You didn't realise she was so expensive? The clue is in the name!'

"And when you've saved up enough money, what are you going to say in in your full-page ad in the New York Times?"

If you don't see what you want, buy something you don't want!

'Just follow my voice to the checkout stand.'

'Good heavens, Margaret, the bailout was for wall street, not for you.'

Buyer's Remorse for Dummies

"Just groceries? Oh I see..."

'Credit card customer of the month'

Eat it while it's still £6.50.

'Of course I care for you. You're the most expensive woman in my life.'

'I think it's time to stop shopping when the computer asks you if you need another shopping cart.'

Spiralling inflation

Pushy Cashpoint

Scrooge and his piggy bank

"I left your credit card outside. It's still smoking."

'If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping...'

"National debt this, national debt that, haven't these politicians heard of plastic?"

My latest invention is genius. It's an affinity card for our best customers. That's not a new idea. Airlines, rental car agencies, hotels … They all have loyalty programs where you can earn discounts and special treatment. Spare me. Ours has a way better name: The Cafe Exclusive VIP Premier Executive Best Customer Reward Program. And we don't trouble customers with confusing discounts and benefits. All hail the VIP premier cheapskate.

"Once I started doing tech-support for family and friends, i had to get a bigger piggy bank."

"They had a special offer at the Supermarket."