Speedy Sightseer T-Shirts

City Travel...rat race special! 10 countries in 10 day: 'I need a vacation'!

Easter Island legs

Ancient Racing

The city of San Francisco switches from cable cars to satellite dish at a cost of only $79.99 a month for the first six months.

Bob's Driving School.

The Slug Replaces the Cheetah as the Fastest Animal on Earth.

Middle-aged guy spots an available convertible. The mating ritual begins.

'Now will you pull over and ask for directions?'

'My new browser is so fast I have to take motion sickness pills.'

"This car is very fast and very expensive. Just how bad is your midlife crisis?"

A caterpillar is rowing itself along

"An enormous amount of advanced engineering has gone into our latest models. That's not to say, of course, that an enormous amount of advanced engineering hasn't always gone into all our models."

'Aloha! On behalf of the tourist board may I thank you for visiting our remote and mysterious island - Have a nice day!'

Computer Controlled Car

'So, then.... you don't LIKE life in the fast lane?'

'He's on a high carbohydrate diet,'

'Though we understand your feelings towards your automobile, we aren't able to approve your application to marry it.'

Cow outboard engine

Next World Tours

Entering Vermont, No Artificial Coloring

'I'd love to put you behind the wheel of this car. However, I doubt the bank will allow you to finance it for 30,000 months.'

'I wanted a little more speed. I just hope I'm not violating any laws by using a jet engine.'

Slipstream

'I normally don't ride a dirt bike, but my motorcycle doesn't do well on potholes.'

Pamplona 500

"So the question you need to ask yourself is - 'Just how much of a mid-life crisis can I afford?'"

"My boss wanted someone with drive so I hired a NASCAR racer."

"Unfortunately, extinction was inevitable for the Have-a-need-for-speed-asaurus."

"What an amazing view!"

Pedalo Racer

"I don't get it. If he's no faster than me, how come he always beats me?"

Man who's eyes are in his glasses,

Racing pit crew member holds sign for driver: Stop And Ask For Directions.

'Is it faster than a hare?'

'So cool: Even with the 'action shot' setting, the photos of you running are still blurry...'