Speeding Humorist Pillows

'You wanted a speedy trial, so I'm sentencing you to a swift kick.'

'You're not supposed to jump over the net.'

'One carry-on!'

'Let him go. We'll catch him in the backstretch. Hippos can run faster than humans, but only in short bursts.'

'Think Basics.'

'There's a fee for each carry-on bag, including your bag of chips.'

Straddling bus stop above a regular bus stop.

The Pole Vault Washing Line

Speed bump in honor of JD Yomp 1866-1957 - Inventor of Asphalt.

'It's internal. Probably one of his stomachs...'

'Eton Football (By Dumb-Crambo Junior.)'

Track & Field & Stream magazine

"Hey, this is a marathon, not a sprint."

'Harold, your right turn signal is still 'on'.'

Joe shoots his best scores with his graphite shaft!

Speed Checked By Radar.

A license plate that reads LIC-PLT

'Except for that, how did the experimental plane perform?'

Bumper sticker reads: 'I'd rather be text messaging.'

Annual 10K Fun Run

Visual Gag: Caution Goose Bump

"It's the wrong type of tracks on the snow."

Racers' Gate.

"Move over, pardner, yer ridin' in the horsepool lane!"

'Apparently he does 20 yards to the pint.'

'Look on the bright side, Officer, I've reduced the electrical consumption of an entire neighborhood.'

Move to Arizona.

Shouldn't you clean the windscreen?

The Club Singles Duel.

"And that's why I avoid moisture-wicking sportswear."