Speed-reading Sage Pillows

Ever notice if you speed-read these cave drawings you invent animation?

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

Spiritualism: Meet the Authors.

John Barth wrote "Everyone is necessarily the hero of his own life story." That he did, little buddy. But what if a person spends most of his life watching tv, films, Youtube, Instagram, Facebook, etc? What if my -- I mean, this person's -- life story is watching other people's life stories? Does that make other people the hero of this person's story? Sometimes I don't know where I end and Kanye begins. That'd be somewhere around Kim Kardashian.

One can hardly be expected to solve the riddle of existence without a computer

Running shoes? You have the wrong idea about "fasting," Brother Ernest!

'Well done Hopkins - I hear you cleared your in tray for the first time in twenty years.'

"I got my emotional baggage down to a little carry-on."

"I wish you people would just read the blog."

'So, the memo said, 'twenty-one gnu salute' huh?'

"Do I look like a wise man to you?"

'I still have all my own teeth.'

"Oh, do stick it adjectively adverbially where the 'effin' sun don't shine!"

'It's all right, Dad -- it's a Buddhist chat room!'

Barry Cryer.

"Rough year?" (2021 new year baby asking 2020 old year man)

"It's a weak pilot, but, if your stick with it, by Season 3 you grow completely numb to the show's quality and just keep hitting Next Episode."

"It's nice of you to say so, Ben, but somehow the idea of 'Shakespeare in the Park' doesn't really appeal to me."

There's the pay TV remote, the set top box remote, the TV remote...now where did I put the worth watching remote?

"O.K., let's see what all the fuss is about."

The past only looks good when you're living in the present.

'Wh-h-hatz-u-upp, dude?'

Independant Spelling Consultant.

"Just give me the broad strokes."

'Yes, it's a very interesting show, but we really need to talk about all the time you waste watching it - perhaps during the next commercial break.'

'There goes Mr. Negativity.'

"It's not just his rapier wit that intimidates."

Liv Ullmann

'You're consuming way too much sodium. Read the story of Lot's wife, and come back next week.'

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single status update."

"The meaning of life? Let me Google that for you."

'You're new at this, aren't you?'

'That mantra you gave me is politically incorrect!'

Guru Needs Tech Support

"It's practically impossible to heat this damned place."