Speculation Detective Pillows

'Well, it is just my opinion, but it's backed by the best rumor and speculation the internet can provide.'

The Big Book of Suspicious Crawl Spaces

'Look on the bright side; you got out of that stock before it became...unstable.'

"My name's Edwin, and I'm addicted to risk."

"Some idiot spread the rumour that the boss had called in sick! Now look what's happened to the tobacco and coffee stocks!"

'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'

'I'm a 100% consistent investor. I buy bonds when I should buy stocks when I should buy bonds.'

'How come the rabbit didn't have good luck with the foot?'

"Facts are good, but we need all the rumors, gossip, and speculation to fully understand the situation."

"It's a setup."

"Really, Mr. Stevens, this fantasy of being turned into a giant frog is absurd. We both know there's no such thing as a curse, and you can't seriously believe your mother-in-law is actually a witch. . ."

'I don't like it... It's too quiet.'

'He's a cheat I tell you - it's just a trick!'

'I heard it through the grapevine.'

'The market dropped sharply on the rumor that new sell off rumors in the financial sector will lead to more widespread rumors...'

Department of Pure Speculation.

"Skip the ghost stories. Tell us your conspiracy theory again!"

International Speculators

"I'm an atheist. I don't believe in programmers."

"See...polystyrene!"

Net Zero Superstitions

'I am a bit suspicious...In my experience, there is no such thing as a 'Free Lunch'...'

'Yes, fifty to one is a great return on your money, but the muddy track makes it a risky investment.'

'And that's your idea of a desk calendar...'

I don't trust that guy.

'Aaaaaaaaawwwwww!'

'Oh dear. My husband looks suspicious.'

"...And that's the studio where we filmed the Moon Landing..."

"They're not home.."

'Looks like the gods are angry.'

"He's not a big, bad wolf, Gramps - he's a predatory insurance agent!"

'I gather this is your first sting operation.'

'Do you have poor credit? . . . Visit paydayloanshark.com for instant cash!'

'What's this rumor I hear, that they're putting saltpeter in Meals-On-Wheels!'