Spectrum Enthusiast Gifts

Normal scale

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

'Humans are so considerate: They put perches like these for us on every one of their houses...'

WiFi Signals

Artist and Musician

'... and the winner for 'The Noisiest Picture of the Year' is...'

"Stargazing sure is less painful at night."

Dog FM. (Man blowing dog whistle into radio microphone).

'He likes a room where he can reverberate.'

"Our kids may like your giant soundbar, but the neighbors seem to have a different opinion."

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

Hospital Departments

The next wave

Musical Eye Test

'I told you we should have gone wireless.'

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

'Howard can't come to the phone now. He's standing by for a major concert announcement.'

'I'm Bored'

The sounds of a tree falling in the forest.

"See! Thousands of new listeners."

The Gong

'I think I've found what's causing the radio's funny buzzing sound.'

"Being heard got me where I am today."

'Honey. . . I'm ommmmmmmmmmmmmmm.'

"The sea waves on my sound machine are attracting a following."

"It's not icky - it's tactile."

'Access to the kids? No. I want access to the audio equipment.'

Ohm. He has a degree in electrical engineering!

Wow! I've met some famous scientists up here! Yesterday I met Thomas Edison -- it was very illuminating! And today I met Professor Pavlov! You know who was, don't you? I'm not sure -- but the name sure rings a bell!

Randi Rhodes

"What's your question for 'Ask Sadie'?" "My mom's in a nursing home. I think someone's stealing her jewelry." "What's the matter, you're afraid someone is stealing your inheritance?" "Simple solution: Send your mother to Japan, where their entire culture reveres the elderly." "Sayonara, grandma!!!" "Are you sure that's not just a stereotype?" "Who cares?!"

Feelings towards radios #2 Picket signs with pictures of radios on them

'Congratulations, its a six pound audio technician.'

'Congratulations. You're our 15th caller. The grant is yours!'

'Hey, look how tiny the Earth appears through this end!'