Spectrum Enthusiast Gifts

Normal scale

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

'Humans are so considerate: They put perches like these for us on every one of their houses...'

WiFi Signals

Artist and Musician

'... and the winner for 'The Noisiest Picture of the Year' is...'

'He likes a room where he can reverberate.'

"Stargazing sure is less painful at night."

Dog FM. (Man blowing dog whistle into radio microphone).

Hospital Departments

The next wave

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

"Our kids may like your giant soundbar, but the neighbors seem to have a different opinion."

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

'I told you we should have gone wireless.'

'Howard can't come to the phone now. He's standing by for a major concert announcement.'

Musical Eye Test

The sounds of a tree falling in the forest.

'I'm Bored'

"See! Thousands of new listeners."

"Being heard got me where I am today."

The Gong

"The sea waves on my sound machine are attracting a following."

'I think I've found what's causing the radio's funny buzzing sound.'

'Honey. . . I'm ommmmmmmmmmmmmmm.'

"It's not icky - it's tactile."

'Access to the kids? No. I want access to the audio equipment.'

'Congratulations, its a six pound audio technician.'

"What's your question for 'Ask Sadie'?" "My mom's in a nursing home. I think someone's stealing her jewelry." "What's the matter, you're afraid someone is stealing your inheritance?" "Simple solution: Send your mother to Japan, where their entire culture reveres the elderly." "Sayonara, grandma!!!" "Are you sure that's not just a stereotype?" "Who cares?!"

Feelings towards radios #2 Picket signs with pictures of radios on them

Randi Rhodes

'Congratulations. You're our 15th caller. The grant is yours!'

'Hey, look how tiny the Earth appears through this end!'

No Hand Signals