Spanish Teacher Gifts

After 31 years of teaching high school Spanish, Bob Vermer was beginning to show signs of burnout.

What are you talking about?

"Baldo, Gracie...you need to learn more Spanish. For the rest of the week, I'm going to speak nothing but Spanish, and Tia Carmen will act as your interpreter, OK? Tienen tarea?"

"'Pobre Pablo! Hoy esta Enfermo.' Can you tell me what I just said, Cruz?"

"Maybe getting Carmen to give them Spanish lessons was a bad idea."

OK, I admit it...I don't know Spanish! Help me out! What should I tell my boss?"

"Oh, it has to be la señorita, does it? Still trying to perpetuate the fiction of biological gender identity, are we?"

A Puppet Named Juan

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

Nathaniel Hawthorne

Punctuation Police

Peter's Pitas - now with pickled peppers.

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

Shakespeare was bisexual

Pajama Day 743

Desert $2.75. See? -- It wasn't a typo.

Contemporary English Lesson: The Cat was Sat on the Mat.

Thomas Hardy

"I used to be your old school teacher, I always said you would amount to nothing."

'She speaks 6 languages and can't say 'No' in any of them. . .'

"Nevermore." "You don't have to use 'air quoths' every time."

With the popularity of spell-checkers, many people are turning to the new speech-checkers.

'Now, what's Italian for pizza?'

Harv's general clumsiness with prepositions comes back to haunt him.

'I made a hundred on the Spanish test. Gracias.'

Sometimes Y Turn

"Mom, can you come get me?"

William Faulkner

Humanities 101. I hear you're reading Greek plays in there. Yeah, it's a real Medea blitz!

Math Teacher

"I'm Albert, your new mathematics teacher, but you can call me Al."

Why do you direct the school musical, Mr. K? It's a privilege

"This is an excellent story, Doris, so far."

"'Grim Reapers' was considered too offensive, these days we're known as 'afterlife facilitators.'"