Space Sluggers T-Shirts

High-gravity baseball

"We've made great progress!"

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

'Oh, I'm not a guru -- I'm just big on personal space.'

"And that little pinpoint of light? That’s our new baby."

Cosmonaut

"All this pitching and hitting- I'm convinced there's a deeper meaning to it all."

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

'I hate it when they emulate their major league heroes.'

Astronaut love

"Jonathan! I've told you not to put your space toys in the freezer and pretend they're on the ice planet!"

"I need to buy a faster fastball."

"You were going 24,998 in a 24,955!"

If they can put a man on the moon, why can't they... market a roll of tape that's easy to start every time?!

'Sir, it's those monkeys we sent into space in 1959... They're back!'

'I told you about the march solar flares before you went out, didn't I?'

Director: US Space Research.

We're looking for a house with a bigger crawl space… Realty.

Rocket science for beginners.

"I know I told you to fool him into thinking you've got nothing left, but now you've got me convinced."

"Oh that's just great! You remembered how to make fire. I'm so impressed!"

Alien abducts Olympic athlete.

"We have a lot to be thankful for."

'I can just see him twenty years down the road pitching for the Giants.'

'No, Billy, their first baseman is messing with your head. You won't go to hell for stealing second.'

Moonbillies.

'See if they have their green cards.'

'Play your best. There's going to be a scout for the ten year olds in the stands!'

'Hi - We're here to be adopted by Angelina Jolie!'

"I see on your application you'd like to work remotely."

"Take me to David Bowie."

The Marie Kondo landfill

'I thought you invited me to play T-ball!'

Bassoon musical instrument.

Organic Salad