Space Humor Lover Pillows

"Even men from other planets reject me."

"God, the sun is driving me crazy."

'I'm not saying he's neurotic, but he has serious left-and-right hemisphere issues.'

'I'm lucky that kid called!'

Alien catches clothesline on trip to Earth.

"Good Lord! Life on Mars...adorable life on Mars!"

Save Our Universe

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

"And the Hungriest Black Hole there ever was ate everything in the entire universe and lived happily ever after."

"You know that moon was passed a minute ago?..."

'...and at this point I'm afraid the tax laws become totally theoretical.'

"It's scary that humans are our benchmark for intelligent life in the universe."

'Can you believe it? - The doofus doesn't know whether this is the Alpha Quadrant or not!'

First Contact

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

"It's Houston. They have a problem."

'...it's some distance away - but there are lots of 'em and they're edible.'

Astronaut: Pay and Display Only

Escaping Black Hole - '..But captain that's the pensions black hole there is no escape!'

"Surprisingly, the soil samples provide new evidence for the 'giant ball of cheese' hypothesis."

'Sir, we're receiving a signal from space. It might be a candidate for possible intelligent alien life!' 'Nice going you ninny, you butt-dialled Earth! Now they're going to know we exist!'

"Thank you earthlings, without your space junk we would be nothing."

"With the whole world in NATO, we won't have to take any more crap from Mars."

'That must be the guy from corporate.'

'I've had a toothache for the last million light years, take me to your dentist.'

The Moon Falls Out of the Sky.

Aliens would have destroyed us years ago if it weren't for our entertainment value.

"Be realistic, how can lumps of rock zooming around in space affect our lives down here?"

"What am I, chopped liver?"

Space Shuttle.

'Mars will have an oxygen atmosphere within six months. We just sent a payload of Kudzu there.'

"Remember, there's an additional charge if you don't refill the tank before you return it."

"Yes. I'm 100% sure it's your turn for a moonwalk."