Sovereign Saver Pillows

'I realize it's not much of a war, but it's all we can afford right now.'

"What the... mine are lunar eclipse glasses!"

His temperature appears to rise and fall with the FT index

"Forget the allowance - I need a benefactor!"

'As you go through life, always remember that money isn't everything...Health benefits and stock options are also very important.'

"It failed the stress test."

'My piggy bank charged shaking fees.'

Global warming causes widespread flooding, but fortunately scientists were able to locate the giant plug on the ocean floor.

"The hardest thing about learning to tumble is the floor."

'Sub lease' and 'Executive suite' putting money into a smug piggy bank

Coastguard

'Oh - It's you.'

'All the money we saved buying bulk food on sale we blew on this huge freezer!'

'In our thirty years of marriage she's squirreled away loads of money, but she can't remember where.'

From trash to treasure

Shepherd

'You realize, of course, there's nothing wrong with me. . . I'm only here 'cause of your 50%-off-first-visit coupon and I am not a serial bargain shopaholic.'

'But, Pop ... I thought bears hibernated in the winter.'

'Finally...some money for our 401K!'

"We need to tell your leaders: It's not just global warming, it's galaxy warming!"

"The Scrimpshaws have finally decided to deposit their savings."

'Thanks to me, you can save the money for the cat food from now on and put it into more reasonable investments!'

'Another dead squirrel, Lieutenant! What kind of Madman are we dealing with?'

Gentleman wanting to know exactly how much he owes his butler

'I realize this might be carping but I never did live long enough to enjoy my IRA account.'

"You don't have to spend a lot of money to have a good time?"

"With the money I save on gas, I can get new phones for both of us."

"I wish all those politicians who promised to make the world a better place for us would get on and do it!"

Two children walking on the beach and carrying their sand buckets. One says, 'I'll trade you two tar balls for a syringe.'

"I've discovered a great way to diet...I just look at the price of food and I lose my appetite!"

Actually, I was looking for a tax haven.

'The money we're saved on gas paid for Jim's leg when he tripped over the cord.'

Jeff discovered a new bank account where his money would always be safe.

"Papi, I'm planning my future. How much money do you have in my college fund?"