Sophisticated Satire Lover Gifts

"This was an advanced civilization. I see a little copyright symbol."

"Would you say that the sales projections in your 3 year plan are realistic?"

The Berlin Peace Movement

It's a new government directive requiring us to be 58% more cheerful within 18 months.

Beckett for Beginners: "Waiting for Thumbkin"

Bureaucracy gone mad!

'Probably giving evidence at some sort of industrial tribunal....heh!'

'Upon further review, the pig did not have control of the ball prior to being eaten...'

"I've deregulated Arthur, but he still doesn't run very efficiently."

The Modern Damocles -

"I hate weddings. They make me feel a momentary lapse of cynicism."

The Notre Dame Five Year Restoration Plan Swing Into Action.

The Unknown Philosopher, who first realised life is no picnic.

Bureau of Missing Door Knobs

"I'm a huge fan of your work."

Knights of the Round Whatever

ENNUI...(smiley face).

"Maybe I will and maybe I won't - You're not prejudiced against transvestites, are you?"

The Milbrook Verney chair in literature. The C.K. Frebish endowment for footnotes.

'Of course cutting back on this level of bureaucracy will require a lot of work...'

Hamlet.

Art Vandalism

Well done, Harris. That's one of the straightest paperclips I've ever seen.

John Banville

"Thanks a bunch. I'll just run these by our committee and pass them along."

This would be Andy's first and last day as golf instructor at Sunset Oaks Country Club: "Remember, *hic*....Always jerk your head up and swing at the ball as hard as you can."

"Five hundred years from now, who'll know the difference?"

'Never to be seen again!"

'A role model? Yes, I suppose he was. Everywhere he went, people would say 'That's Bill Fenton... You don't want to be that guy!''

Might Versus Right.

'It's not that simple, Ms. Whelan. You vcan't just shop around until you find a disease you like.'

Suppliers of fine pin-stripe

"Lionel will be watching the new Administration very closely."

'At this price, I only have to sell one bottle to have a good year.'

"New law, Diogenes. We're confiscating your barrel."