Songwriting Sage Gifts

'I can't write cheating songs because my wife's too insecure.'

"I've got rhythm, music, my girl - check. But somehow I still want more."

"Here's another one written in E minor and in case you haven't guessed by now, it's the only chord I know."

"I can't protect you from everything, but I can read you stories that make you believe I can protect you from everything."

"This is my new country song I wrote about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

"Think of it as buying in – not selling out."

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

"After the show, I'll be autographing any computer or phone screens where my albums are streamed."

"Woke up this morning, someone had nicked my guitar..."

Lady of the bath...

"Babe, I'm gonna leave you... It may take a few eons, but I am definitely gonna leave you..."

"If you could be any Bob Dylan you wanted to, which Bob Dylan would you be?"

"That is an outrageous slur."

"First, I sent a rocket of a drive down the fairway, then I took the 7-iron, put that ball on the green...a hundred and eighty yards if it was an inch..."

"She loves you... yeah... yeah... yeah..."

"Do you like it better when I go to the F or the Dm?"

Turning Japanese: I really think so.

'As I walk through the halls, I see teachers teaching and students learning and I say to myself, 'what wonderful school, what a wonderful world.''

Bryan Ferry

'Hey, wait a minute...Apples aren't indigenous to this geopraphical region.'

"How about we write a song combining Brexit with unrequited love?"

New music conference

Spiritualism: Meet the Authors.

Guitar Man.

"I can neither confirm nor deny what this next song is about."

Bashful in Nashville

"I've got those 'Don't worry about me, I'll just be here, all alone' blues."