Socratic Thinker Pillows

"It was Socrates, wasn't it, who said, 'The unexamined life is not worth living'?"

"You know, Socrates said, 'The unexamined life is not worth living,' however, in your case, Edwin, it might be a blessing."

"Third quarter numbers were good after we cut our global workforce three to two."

'Call me immediately if there's any serious side effects so I can notify my lawyer.'

Man Eating Minimalist Meal

The First Fire Stick

"Let's face it. The only play you've ever liked is 'Stop the World - I Want to Get Off.'"

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"

"Imagine if only 1/2 the companies that claimed to have a great culture actually did."

When Engineers Crack.

Reverse psychology

The World's Biggest Book Club

A political promise is intended to be a golden egg...Which is kept in a pork barrel and after an election...Hatches into a dead duck before...it turns invisible so it can quietly vanish.

'Stop emailing me, I am standing right here.'

Admissions test for the Danbury Institute of Philosophy

'I'd go back if I were you.'

"David live a rich, full life, despite what his Wikipedia page says."

"In school we learned about Staten Island. Is that where they make all those pills you take?"

'I have no one to blame but myself, for now.'

'If executive bonuses are outlawed, only outlaws will have bonuses.'

'Johnson, if you're going to have negative thoughts, I suggest you get rid of that thought balloon!'

Elvis fan holding a sign reading 'NOT MY KING'.

"Hey germ, pick on someone your own size."

"I'm not going to lie. It took a large speaker's fee to get me to say your future is bright."

Community church - the home of religion lite - Sermon: 'Atheism? You may be right!'

'But your honor, imitation is the sincerest form of copyright infringement.'

'This whole Noah's Ark business sounds like a quota system to me!'

Scientific Research: 'Uh...why'd it take'em 20 yeahs t' figyah that out?'

"Let's try to think of something that untold millions of people will buy."

'You understand, Yomp, it's not me speaking. It's the corporation!'

"Why do I hate religion? Imagine if half the money ever donated to religion had instead been used for scientific research. That's the world religion stole from me! Instead of worrying about the coronavirus, I could be slaying orcs on a starship's holodeck!"

"...And this is Mable, who will assist me with the billing."

"Picking the right ethnicity of your nanny is the single-hardest part of being a mother these days."

Hey boss, it's April 13th. A couple years ago, you said come back April 13, 2015, and we could talk about you giving me a raise. Yes, but that was predicated on the notion that you'd need a raise by now. I see you're still alive. Clearly you haven't starved to death. You smell minty-fresh, so clearly you haven't been forced out onto the streets. Karl Marx said it best: "From each according to his ability, to each according to his need." I'm pretty sure that is not what Marx meant.

You're too old to go back to Camp Owonsit. That's ok. It's all little kids. How about Lake Kinepesakau Camp. It's all jocks. Your son needs an enriching summer experience. Thoughts? How about � Camp Workforaliving? It's all depressing adults.