Socioeconomic Humor Enthusiast Pillows

'Unemployment just isn't working for me.'

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

'Pretty strange term, market share, considering the whole object is not to.'

'This financial report is frightening. Who wrote it, Stephen King?"

"While we're on the subject of earnings, does anyone have a clever metaphor using the word, 'toilet'?"

"The fish - will it be the market price at the time of ordering, the time of eating or the time of paying?"

"No, it hasn't, but when the sky does fall your investments are going to do very, very, well.''

I think I can explain what happened to your investment, with the use of this simple chart.

'Nonsense, Harry, it's my treat. I'm filing for bankruptcy tomorrow.'

Trickledown economics

Aliens - 'We heard stuff is cheap here.'

"Good to see they're trying to keep the high street vibe."

Office of economic forecasting.

Escaping Black Hole - '..But captain that's the pensions black hole there is no escape!'

'It's the NEW Chinese Stock Market Report.'

'Oh dear. I seem to have put the decimal point in the wrong place again.'

'We buy and sell them.'

"This town ain't big enough for the both of us and, even if it was, I doubt either of us could afford to buy a place here given the current sellers' market."

'Today the stock market closed early so money managers could take time to stop and smell the profits.'

'The rich get richer, the poorer get poorer..' '..And the comfortably off stay comfortably off!'

Grand Opening and Closing Down Sale simultaneously occurring.

'Consumer confidence is up.. in the 'Money in the mattress' sector.'

'Someday, Son, all of this will be yo....!'

Inflating assets to get a loan. Too poor to pay taxes

"That man's a legend in this office. He has 100% accuracy in predicting the past."

Government Handouts.

'He's known for his pessimistic prognostications on the stock market.'

'Great! Thanks to the damn mortage crisis, we've got to live in a neighbourhood now where we wake up with yellow feet every second morning...'

'Last chance to give for next 400 yards.'

Thanks to his stocks, Bob now lives in the middle of a great green garden outside the crowded city.

Leprechaun finds EU bail out at the end of a rainbow.

Office of Management & Budget. Now hiring: crowdfunding expert to reduce the U.S. budget deficit.

'Sorry about the mess -- I've been slashing the Federal budget.'

"Since it cost as much as our house, can we take out a mortgage instead of a loan?"