Socially Conscious Worker Gifts

"The top two drawers are for insurance purposes, the next two are accounts payable, and we let a homeless man named Lenny sleep in the bottom drawer at night.'"

"And when the canyon fills up, that's it; herd immunity."

Office Ergonomics.

"...and the asparagus this evening is delightful. It's been simmering all day in the tears of the poor."

'This training session is all about challenging assumptions. For example you see someone looking depressed, dishevelled, unkempt it's easy to jump to conclusions. But they may not be a social worker, they may be a client!'

"And you call yourself a socially-responsible investment portfolio!"

Investments: Yes, we have organic, local & cruelty-free stocks.

Statue of Christopher Columbus

Middle Manager

'I wish they would just spring for a paper shredder.'

'Last chance to give for next 400 yards.'

Democracy In Action

"Larry, can you take over the meeting for a minute? My doctor is insisting I take a few deep breaths."

The NHS - 'I'm afraid years of neglect and abuse have left her in terminal decline.'

Your performance evaulations and sales figures are exceptional, but the company's a little bit concerned by your cholesterol numbers.

Organic Filing

Rebels without causes: Lorem ipsum, T.B.D., Insert slogan here

"How can I get mad at him for sleeping on the job? It was me who told him naps were good for your health."

Investments: 'We now offer 'social conscience' funds and 'corporate ethics' funds'.

"I'd be very happy to give if I could be confident the money was spent well!"

Big Society: 'Somebody should do something!'

'Say cheese.'

'Don't you think you should get involved in some volunteer work, Bernie?'

'Thank you for the memo on carpooling, sir, but we don't have enough for a carpool due to the layoffs.'

"Of course I'm socially engaged! I commented on a story about child labour with a sad emoticon!"

Sorry

'Big Issue,miss?'

Sardines

"The Smiths have got more Ukrainians than us."

"He's a new bagger from the supermarket. He's really conscientious!"

Heartless

"He's off to a fancy-dress party. He's going as a care bear."

Avoiding a Beggar

'I am so far out of touch with the needy that I don't even know where to find them.'

Words DO hurt. Case in point: "BUM." ? ?