Social Smoother T-Shirts

Do you mind if my mother joins our little business dinner ? You know what it's like, I don't want people from the office to think I'm sleeping my way to the top.

"Just bring me something that's going to look good on social media."

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

"I don't know anything about art, but this is a damned good Martini."

'If you're looking for compensatory materialism on wheels, look no further.'

'10,000 years and no one's improved on the idea of meat on a stick!'

A man reads a book called 'Opening Lines' while a woman reads a book called 'Brush Offs'.

"My feeling is that while we should have the deepest respect for reality, we should not let it control our lives."

Soccer games took on a whole new meaning for the parents of Hillsdale Youth Soccer.

'We'll talk later, Ed, but for now we have a quick and dirty solution to your objections.'

Kind- hearted, nature-loving Jeff built a new improved bird table.

Liquidity Lunch

'Can you recommend something that will make my date sound interesting.'

'Be sure to ask George about his tomatoes.'

Happy hour.

"Not only is the grass greener, but check out that Mercedes!"

'Beer's more than just a food -- it's a comfort food!'

'You're not interrupting anything...the four of us are just sitting around before dinner...Barbara, me and our two phones.'

"Sipsies?"

'The internet has made me a more critical thinker. I'm critical of everything I see on it.'

"I've never been wild about this bar, but it does get you where you want to go."

The Icebreaker

Men's Parallel Bars

"Generally speaking, when his nose gives way, it means he's had enough."

'It's better to drink a little too much than much too little!'

Mixing Business and Pleasure

'Are you a good mixer?'

'Once I get started I drink like a fish.'

'I occasionally need to read my tweets to remember what I was doing.'

"I'm at that point in my life where everything calls for a drink."

'You're in Gallery Two... right, see you in the bar.'

"This one looks promising... likes sushi, long winter nights and chilling out in large groups."

'How do you do? I'm your wife's husband by a previous marriage.'

"So what are you planning on giving up for New Year?"

'Hold on! Now I remember, you swirl the wine first.'