Social Situation Strategist Pillows

"What's with the Tim Russert act?"

"If I go to the party alone, will I be able to leave when I want? But then, there's always the possibility that I will get stuck talking to someone. I can't shake the problem is me. What if no one else likes me? I'm the only one being critical... The issue is I'm not enough and it's really so huge." "The over thinker"

"That's Brian Eggleston, de facto leader of the playground intelligentsia."

"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"

'No thanks, I don't drink when I'm driving home a point about investing.'

"Now remember, if I jump out the window, I want to leave."

"Let me get this, but keep in mind that you'll pay for it in other, more subtle ways later on."

"Think I'll be a more effective alpha male if I learn to play pool?"

"And this right here was our weekend in the Hamptons."

'Dear Miss Etiquette, I'm never sure if I should say anything...'

Frankenstein's monster picking out his brain for the day.

"'Disability benefits' they said... Not while there are perfectly good jobs as traffic cones to be had!"

'Are you two friends?' - 'No, we just hate the same people.'

She realised it would be foolish to start a diet with third cousin Rodney's retirement party due in only 12 years.

Capitalism and the Earth

"Our new dog seems to be really, really shy!"

'Oh hey Rhonda, whatcha doin?'

Why are you here?

'Dinner for two, table for seven.'

"Agreed then-I won't network you if you don't network me."

"McNab here is with our consensus engineering department."

"If they find out I'm a flight attendant pretend a heart attack so we can leave early."

"Okay, so we all agree to support your father's run for office even though his ideas are bats**t crazy."

"Remember, son, keep your friends close, your enemies closer, and anyone who says 'Beer me' as far away as possible."

"I wish I'd been invited to all these parties before I discovered the joys of staying in."

"Sorry, Jeff. Two's company, three's an infestation."

'Let's find anothr cafe - I'm not eating in any restaurant that outranks me'

"I'm going to write you a prescription for new friends."

"I just feel like it's important NOT to make good eye contact when communicating."

"What we used to refer to as 'a social life'."