Social Setting Strategist Pillows

It's hard to choose, isn't it? Yes, it is ... I can't decide if I should call the police or simply alert the bouncer.

"That's Brian Eggleston, de facto leader of the playground intelligentsia."

"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"

'No thanks, I don't drink when I'm driving home a point about investing.'

"What's with the Tim Russert act?"

"Now remember, if I jump out the window, I want to leave."

"Let me get this, but keep in mind that you'll pay for it in other, more subtle ways later on."

"And this right here was our weekend in the Hamptons."

"Think I'll be a more effective alpha male if I learn to play pool?"

'To address this mistake we must use root-cause analysis. I'll begin by saying it's not my fault.'

"Dammit, Higgins, we don't need simple explanations, we need complicated excuses!"

'We'll also need to do a credit/blame analysis.'

'Dear Miss Etiquette, I'm never sure if I should say anything...'

"Do we want to tackle this head on, or just stun it with a glancing blow until Monday?"

'Have your people facebook my people.'

"'Disability benefits' they said... Not while there are perfectly good jobs as traffic cones to be had!"

'Are you two friends?' - 'No, we just hate the same people.'

"If I go to the party alone, will I be able to leave when I want? But then, there's always the possibility that I will get stuck talking to someone. I can't shake the problem is me. What if no one else likes me? I'm the only one being critical... The issue is I'm not enough and it's really so huge." "The over thinker"

"It's a dog-eat-dog economy. And I'm the Doberman."

"Our new dog seems to be really, really shy!"

'His social skills have improved since he lost his job in banking.'

She realised it would be foolish to start a diet with third cousin Rodney's retirement party due in only 12 years.

Capitalism and the Earth

'I have a twitter account to slag off my facebook friends and I use facebook to insult my followers on twitter.'

'You got much on at the moment?'; 'No, nothing really.' (Naked man)

'Oh hey Rhonda, whatcha doin?'

'I certainly phoned SOMEBODY and said, honey, I'm bringing home a guest for dinner!'

Why are you here?

This stuff fixes things at home, why not here?

'Dinner for two, table for seven.'

"Agreed then-I won't network you if you don't network me."

"McNab here is with our consensus engineering department."

"If they find out I'm a flight attendant pretend a heart attack so we can leave early."

"I wish I'd been invited to all these parties before I discovered the joys of staying in."

"Remember, son, keep your friends close, your enemies closer, and anyone who says 'Beer me' as far away as possible."