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Social Distancing Common Sense

Politically Correct Snowperson

"You know, there are other emojis."

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

"Brian's fine. He`s got his own coping mechanism."

'Don't bite. They're trolling again.'

'Tell your boss we represent an independent watchdog committee.'

"I just wish the Earth was as beautiful to live on as it is to look at... It's right behind me, isn't it?"

'Of course the Johnsons got the big cloud.'

The Family Joules: Part 3

"Of course, the actual honey is all made overseas."

"I prefer 'prostitute'. 'Media whore' implies that I'm not getting paid."

Athens Playhouse. Euclid is rehearsing a play he wrote about lust, money and lies. Investment Sales Office. Don't be obtuse! Face each other from this angle! He's a tough director. It's surprising that Euclid, the father of geometry, wrote about passion, money and deceit. I thought so too, until I read the script. It's a story about a pyramid scheme and a love triangle!

The Vicar 's Invitation to Dinner.

"Only three hundred and sixty-seven followers? Maria's not an asset to the abbey."

Shawn considered himself a vegetarian by proxy.

'Next time you hear confession from that barmaid say, Tut-tut not COR.'

"Paper or plastic?"

Attack Of The Guy From The Other Room

"OK, well, if you do hear anything, be sure to give us a call."

"I always wondered who got my transplant."

"Well, we can kiss being free-range goodbye."

Children should be seen and not heard. We're decorative.

'Actually, we don't like the term 'cannibal', we prefer to be called 'homovores'.'

'I believe in the free enterprise system. I haven't paid for anything in the past 27 years...'

'Oh no! The sharp elbowed middle class!'

" ... and this is my wife - I'm legally obligated to tell you that."

'I wonder if you'd go out with me. I've always wanted to go to couples therapy.'

'Your Majesty, the peasants are out of bread', 'Then let them eat low-carb stuff,'

"So, colony collapse disorder - how funny is it?"

"Make it look like an accident"

'I'll have the Chairman-of-the-board Lunch, and Dexter here will have the Sissy's Salad.'

"Religion, politics, sex...in this part of the world every cartoonist is free to draw whatever he wants!"

"One trip to the dentist and look who's got the attitude!"

Man asking what is a stall at the opera