Social Network Strategist Pillows

'This is interesting, 70% of respondents to our survey said they don't respond to surveys.'

'Have your people facebook my people.'

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

Likes: $2.

"#Win!"

Networking

"That's Brian Eggleston, de facto leader of the playground intelligentsia."

"Looking at you, the moon and beyond, don't you think we could start a blog?"

Bird Tweet.

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

'Our little guy is busy with homework, or if we're lucky, some sort of social network start-up.'

"I'd like to TikTok your offer and get comments before saying yes or no."

"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"

Mark Zuckerberg

'No thanks, I don't drink when I'm driving home a point about investing.'

'Don't bite. They're trolling again.'

"Now remember, if I jump out the window, I want to leave."

From Hunter-Gatherer to Influencer: The Evolution of the Dignity of Labor

"What's with the Tim Russert act?"

Man from refuse department says: 'We'll send you a new wheelie bin, Mrs Trubshaw, there's really no need to 'orchestrate a mass Twitter campaign'.'

"Let me get this, but keep in mind that you'll pay for it in other, more subtle ways later on."

Technology and Love

"And this right here was our weekend in the Hamptons."

'Mr. Smithdon's at his desk, but he's not really there....He's somewhere out there in cyberspace!'

"Think I'll be a more effective alpha male if I learn to play pool?"

"Good afternoon, Ted. I'm your online presence."

E-waste - 'Well there's another hour gone on email.'

'We've postponed the wedding until we come up with something we can do at the ceremony that will become a viral video.'

"Hi, I'd like to add you to my professional network on LinkedIn."

"I'm trying to grow a cancel culture – but it keeps dividing and dividing until there's nothing left."

"I may have been the runt of the litter, but online I'm the alpha dog."

"Social media stocks have taken a beating I'm seeing a lot of avatars on ledges."

Al, pardon me while I check in on Facebook from "Loonytown."

"Do you believe the world is all an illusion?" "I know it is. I know it can be bent by our collective will. When I was born, there were horses and buggies in the streets. But as soon as we all believed we could do it, we went to the moon." "Oh, I agree. That's why I'm trying to get the whole internet to retweet 'It's possible to upload our minds into immortal robot bodies.' If the entire hive mind of Earth tweets that at the same time, it's got to come true." "I hope not. I'd hate for you to end

"Do you have a link I can click on that removes me from all future conversations with you?"