Social Media Nostalgist Pillows

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

"Oh great, the printer is down."

"I'll never forget you."

"Cancel my landline...are you crazy?"

"I love the popping sounds on old vinyl LPs..."

'...please switch of all mobile phones, paging devices and alarm watches...'

"In my day I played a pretty mean cowbell."

'No fax paper? Ok, you'll have to ride for help.'

'Well yes, it is a Jurassic model...OK, I'll knock off two bucks.'

"When I was young, music and lyrics were important! Now it's all about production...it's all jiggly butts, smoke, sexy clothes and crazy videos!"

"Is that when you turn the juke box off?"

His master's voice

"Horton hears The Who!"

'Did I hear right - Bob Dylan's changin' his name back?'

"Sure, e-mail is faster . . . but I miss biting the mailman!"

'Yes, Fluffy was a great dog and to honor her memory, we've decided to keep her name as part of our computer password.'

'Walkman' 'Shuffle man'

His Master Voice Desert Island

"Before I read about my summer vacation, I'd like to ask that all pagers, beepers, and cell phones be turned off."

'I miss fighting who gets the front page of the paper first.'

"I don't get it...there are so many cool new bands out...but it looks like you haven't bought anything in forever!"

"He're the pitch; a sequel to 'Yesterday', but instead of The Beatles, it's The Carpenters. We'll call it 'Yesterday, Once More'."

'Do you by any chance have any conservatory music?'

Workers constructing barcodes

"Sure, you don't know me now, but just wait 'til the year 2000...I'm the Millennium Bug."

Sell me your souls and I'll make all cell phones and computers go away."

"Sure, you used to be a YouTube sensation. But what have you done lately."

ARISTOTLE WITH A BUST OF HOMER:

"Do you like my four wheel drive?"

"You don't need your selfie stick...the booth takes selfies for you!"