Social Media Gourmet Pillows

No Flash Photography of Meals

"Just bring me something that's going to look good on social media."

'Why, thank you. When they started the vineyard five generations ago, I heard they were shooting for freakin' awesome.'

"May I recommend our Seared Filet with Lobster Cream Sauce? It's very photogenic."

"I bet you can't name one person who makes a better lengua casserole than me!"

'Our guest tonight certainly needs no introduction.'

Cat eating fish from fishbowl.

The Good Feud Guide - 'Delia Smith does a nice roasted Worrall-Thompson.'

"I like my steak well done."

"I'm not eating a TV dinner. Now it's called 'Computer Cuisine.'"

'Leeks can disappoint you and garlic will break your heart, but only onions make you cry.'

Microwave confusion.

Chinese Novel Cookie

'Manners are the noises you don't make while you eat.'

"We've gone 'Glutton-Free'."

Storefront reading "Net 'n' Nosh (Formerly Books 'n' Java)"

'When I said you should complain about your steak I didn't mean whining about it on twitter.'

"The food was terrible, but my wife said it photographed well."

'Thanksgiving dinner will be ready some time in February.'

Why Shirley hates to eat genetic modified Broccoli.

"I still call it a custard tart but to be honest, it's a dairy free, soy fructose mix, with no nuts."

"Your dinner is at www.Icouldntbearsed.com."

Claret

Picasso paints AND eats like a child!

Data Processing Center.

"You're right in berating me, ma'am, as I personally decided the price of each entree..."

"We're looking for a hacker to break into our competitors computers and get their recipes."

Christmas canape?

'Freeze Dried Nothing®. Directions: To make something out of NOTHING®, just add water.'

'Yes Sir that is the lowest calorie dish on the menu, the chef has even eaten the fish for you. He says it was wonderful.'

'What...and you take the plunge to call this a gourmet restaurant??!'

Me, I'd pair ketchup with a box of red, but I'd pair mustard with a box of white. Hot dogs.

For Your Dining Pleasure

'This is iDiet, the fanziest restaurant in town. They've got virtual food only.'

Selecting teeth.. "I'll have those, please."