Social Hosting Gifts

"Oh God, I forgot to ask if anybody had lard issues."

Tartine

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

Come dine with me!

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

'A cheeky red?'

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

"I met him on an online dating site. He was on their 'return' section."

Dinner at the Trapdoors

'A little piece of advice, Verl. . . cut your sandwich loaf on a diagonal . . . that way people will think they're gettin' more.'

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

Networking

'There's no art to the mind's construction on Facebook, Macbeth.'

"An everything Martini, please."

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

Canape?

Bird Tweet.

"She likes to be included, so I told her the tea is called 'Squirrel Grey.'"

Updated Classis: Alice Through the You Tube.

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

Obsession with the Internet.

"Marco ..."

'Life is all attitude: 45 seconds of enjoying it...45,000 hours of regretting it...'

"Your MBA and PHD are impressive but what concerns me is your low number of Facebook friends."

'I have multiple personalities and they are all following me on Twitter.'

"And to my nephew, Todd, I leave my 27 Twitter followers."

"...But of course we'll still be friends on Facebook!"

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

"... It's just that, when you said you had a couple of tickets to see the big game..."

"Sorry, that's not my table."

"It comes with a small Greek salad."

Horn of Leftovers

Mark Zuckerberg

"Joel! Killer crust!"

Addicted to Facebook...lost internet connection.