Social Etiquette Fanatic Gifts

Widow advising a man that men often owe their success to the beauty and social charm of their wife.

"Cards to remind people that you still haven’t gotten a thank you note from them"

"Mommy, look! He's man-spreading!"

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

'Knuth! How many times did I tell you not to play with the food??!!'

"This is a little awkward, but you've been our guest for a while now, and we all have work in the morning..."

'Don't get up!'

'Oh I don't mind you turning over my cups to look at the mark. But next time, please finish your tea.'

"More?"

"Smoked salmon, sir?" "I prefer to eat it, thanks."

Let's shake on it.

'The Boss is coming to dinner tonight - please don't open a can of worms again.'

"This time, let's not just fill up on bread."

"This is Jim's second speech on how not to make people mad by talking on your phone. I missed his first speech."

That's a good question, Ossie... may I call you 'Ossie', Ossie?

"Gesundheit!"

"OK, she's back. Just start slowly, and remember to ask her about herself."

'Manners are the noises you don't make while you eat.'

"You can rejoin your party if you think you can refrain from slurping your soup! Got that?"

'May I recommend the red wine?'

"So, Claire tells me you ate her parents last night."

"Would you please sip your drink and not swill it!"

"Generally, when we go around the table sharing what we're grateful for, we just *say* it, Jerry."

'Seriously, Earl. It's just embarrassing!'

'Well, I for one do not believe common courtesy to the host demands deck shoes.'

' Hey...he's not eating like a pig.'

"To save everyone from suffering in polite restraint, I shall eat the last slice."

'I certainly phoned SOMEBODY and said, honey, I'm bringing home a guest for dinner!'

Man of refinement trying to teach a street salesman to say 'asparagus' rather than 'sparrow-grass'

"I've never seen a gimme taken on a fareway before."

'Brat with sauerkraut...which brat did you mean, ma'am?'

Traddles and I in conference with the Misses Spenlow

'Is it okay to drink red wine in brown shoes?'

"Bobby, you may have worked for a circus but that's not an excuse for playing with your food!"

'That's enough, thank you.'