Social Boundary Navigators Gifts

'I'd invite you in, but really, this is a stranger's house I'm entering just to get away from you.'

"And for my next trick, I will confuse general politeness for chemistry."

"Sinclair's not all he's cracked up to be. His reputation exceeds him."

"If I had known how adult her place was I would have brought nicer beer."

"Honey, why don’t you tell Tony and Karen about your microdosing-healing-group thingy or whatever the heck it is?"

"It's a beautiful day. I should go for a walk. . . Oh, now my neighbors are all out there."

'Now,they're going to teach you to talk, but remember, after you learn how.stay away from religion or politics.'

"My business is less bricks and mortar and more coffee shops and laptops. I sell NFTs."

"I didn't want you doing what you did on our last date."

'Maybe we should start the meeting with a 'Getting to know each other' ice-breaker. Would anyone like to share their sexual fantasies?'

"At Ermbruster Academy you son will acquire indispensible life skills."

"Oh, Johnny. I feel like I'm beginning to know you almost as well as Facebook does!"

'This is a simple proclamation-of-lack-of-interest date.'

'Explain to us, son, how gaining nine A levels is uncool and damages your street cred.'

Social median

'I usually don't do online dating.'

"I really like smart women."

'Isn't that kind of thing generally frowned upon in the real mob.'

"Don't stare at his massive claw... Don't stare at his massive claw...

"Would it decrease my chances of getting a five star rating if I were to ask you about your political views."

The Influencer from Hamelin

Bigfoot Singles - 'Currently online: 1'

"I thank you guys for a wonderful time—and for giving me the opportunity to access some laughter!"

The Land of the Uncomfortable Pause

"When you grow up, son, you can be whatever you want, a doctor or a lawyer."

Welcome to Hell: 'Be the first of your friends to like this.'

"When do your in-laws leave?"

'Nobody likes me. I need a media advisor.'

This could be worse than the GFC...an emotional Santa logs on and de-friends Rudolph.'

'Hey Bob, I'd like you to meet my-'

"I'm pretty sure the term is 'interface,' not 'in your face.'"

,Chrome Sweet Chrome

Danae's Celebrity Career: 'Whoa, what's this...another friend request?...but I've never heard of you, and a celebrity can't be associated with riff-raff, so...make friends with my delete button.'

"Maybe quarantine was better?!!!"

Give that woman a Pink Squirrel! Give that man a black eye.