Snowy Scene Enthusiast Gifts

'They suspect arson.'

'Remind me. I'm good with names but not faces.'

"It's not a party until someone gets plowed."

'Gesundheit.'

Ice Skater

"This is the best day ever!" "This is the worst day ever!"

"Whose the new guy?"

"It's probably a fracture - we'll do some imaging on it just to be sure."

'I bet this will confuse the Antarctic scientists!'

Just because I'm adapted to the cold, doesn't mean I like it!

"Greta, look! The first dysfunctional family of winter!"

'Due to the record snowfall, every school on the face of the earth is closed except for Wolfbranch Elementary.'

'Gee, where are all the crowds this year?'

"Of course I gained weight...it snowed last night."

'It's a snow mobile.'

"If you want to play fetch with the dog, throw your own @#&% arm."

"You're going to freeze to death! Put your coat back on."

'I'm detoxing - do you have any mineral water?'

Festive squad

'So you've finally got round to mowing the garden.'

"I modeled this one after me. He hates vegetables, too..."

'I guess we should have expected a seasonal slump.'

Staying Warm.

Angels making snow humans

"It's a snowman, dear. Assembly required."

Phone Mittens

You wouldn't believe the screams of joy I hear when I announce a school closing...and that's just the teachers!

'Another botched Snotox injection...'

Recycled Flake

Music shop's sign: We have 'Sleigh Bells'. Weather Bureau's sign: You're gonna need them.

"The National Weather Service is warning these areas to brace for what could be a crippling amount of Instagrammed snow photos."

Turtle Sledge

"Daddy, is it true that snowmen fart snowflakes?"

Boys happy playing and singing in the snow and ice

Snow Cow