Snowy Escapade Enthusiast Gifts

'Don't be a hero, Dewey! It's a snowboarder - and he's huge! Let's get out of here!!'

"Oh, I'm so sorry! My mother always said that skiing was not a thing for a Jewish person."

'It's okay, there's a trampoline under the snow.'

"This is the best day ever!" "This is the worst day ever!"

"It's probably a fracture - we'll do some imaging on it just to be sure."

'Due to the record snowfall, every school on the face of the earth is closed except for Wolfbranch Elementary.'

"Of course I gained weight...it snowed last night."

'Gee, where are all the crowds this year?'

Festive squad

'So you've finally got round to mowing the garden.'

Phone Mittens

Staying Warm.

"Please, God, help me get up, that's all I ask... I'll go right to church..."

Angels making snow humans

Boy accidentally hits a man with a snowball

"The key is to keep the momentum going when you're establishing the base of the snowman..."

'I guess we should have expected a seasonal slump.'

"It's a snowman, dear. Assembly required."

You wouldn't believe the screams of joy I hear when I announce a school closing...and that's just the teachers!

"I'm a guy. The darn kids just thought this was funny."

'Use a tissue, dear. There's an icicle on your nose.'

Recycled Flake

Music shop's sign: We have 'Sleigh Bells'. Weather Bureau's sign: You're gonna need them.

"...and ski conditions will be excellent on city streets today."

Toboggan Hitchhiker

'Excuse me, are you abominable?'

Zimmer Frame in Winter

Health organizations doubt the benefits of skiing holidays.

"The National Weather Service is warning these areas to brace for what could be a crippling amount of Instagrammed snow photos."

Barbecue in the snow.

Turtle Sledge

Skiing

'First time skiing?'

"Daddy, is it true that snowmen fart snowflakes?"

Boys happy playing and singing in the snow and ice