Snow Day Sipper Gifts

'Let's drink to air conditioning.'

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

"Tommy!"

'There's old Jim off to the shops. Slowed down a lot these days, ain't he.'

"Bad morning. I was running late and skipped my coffee, diet soda, energy drink and Ritalin."

'I swear, if he didn't always pick up the tab, I'd never go drinking with him.'

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

'You sent your wife to get a bottle of wine from the wine cellar? Your jet doesn't have a wine cellar.'

The last song before the party exploded.

"...Stop complaining if it wasn't for the mosquitoes you wouldn't get any exercise at all!"

Beer Order

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

'Would you like some of our house wine? I just made it.'

Anton's Bar and Grill

"Our seasonal special is spiced pumpkin apple butternut squash ale. Would you like that in a frosted mug or over ice cream?"

Hot food cafe open every day except Christmas Day.

Trawling for Fish.

'Just wait until I'm introduced to carbonated beverages!'

"I'm feeling less stressed since I set my biological clock back an hour."

'Come to order' 'I'll have a burger, hold the mayo, and a large cola.'

"Don't you worry JB, everything is fine here."

"Here, son, don't forget your glass of fizzy."

"I prefer snow person."

"It's your turn to shovel the perch."

"When I was your age, I was a lot older."

'This cola only has half the calories, so if I only drink half that would be no calories!'

'What a relaxing vacation. I've even lost track of the news cycles!'

'Don't you have anything larger?'

'A wine list? How prosaic. This is our list of lists: beer, wine, single malt scotch, water, soda, cognac...'

'I feel totally connected now that I can order liquor and attend meetings on the internet.'

"I'm kinda over all this snow. . . I'm ready for spring."

"Okay, we got one cherry lager, with bitters and a pineapple slice, and one honey malt ale with cinnamon and an orange weist. You want these in steins or parfait glasses?"

New for Fall

Psychiatry. Here's your soda --- Would you like a crazy straw?