Snow Cone Strategist T-Shirts

Escape plans at a snow cone farm.

"All natural snow cones for sale."

"If they want a snowball fight, then I'll give them one."

"The rolling wheels...the ringing bells...signal the deliciousness of summer."

"Your tires are spinning and you're stuck."

You know, the snowballs we get in the summer are better. They're flavored!

'Every time we clear all the snow another blizzard hits. We're cursed men Frank. Cursed!'

'I'll take ten, please.'

'Have you heard the news about Susan in logistics?...'

"Baldo, the summer is almost gone and you still haven't found a job!"

Everyone blames spring for Frosty's disappearance, but Micky 'The sno-cone dude' Peretti sure seems to know more than he's letting on.

'Removal sounds politically incorrect.'

"Well, for starters, you’re holding the shovel all wrong."

'Am I shivering or giggling?'

"Remember you making fun of me for using a litter box? Well, good luck going outside now that it's freezing out."

'War is heck!'

Sales chart shows sales going downhill.

Overheated office where a member of staff is suffering from high temperatures

With the Latest Snow and Frigid Cold Things to Consider . . .

SNOW WARS: The fight-back

Snow Cones 50 Cents - self serve.

"But heat rises, so it's cold down here."

'Want to have a snow ball battle?'

"Frankly, business sucks."

"It's a bit derivative."

The world's greatest salesman.

'To prepare for our hostile takeover, Bentley here, has arranged for us to have an old-fashioned snowball fight.'

Where's your dad's car? Under this snow bank.

The Problem Revealed.

"Your snow fort may be bigger, but mine comes with all the technology of a smart home."

Man snow blowing dog toys in winter

"How about all my desserts for a week, and I take out the garbage?"

Winter shopping

"Whoa! You must have eight rugs on! How's that feel? Are you warm enough?"