Snort Chuckler Pillows

So? You snort when you laugh, too.

Pandora's Change Purse...

'I'm sorry Timmy, but if I keep going for help, you'll never learn to take care of yourself,'

Darwin first tested his theory in a letter to a magazine ('Lookalike' letter points to similarity between man and ape.)

People on the train reading each other's books - only it's the same as their own.

"When Butcher Bob gets back from lunch this one is getting a vasectomy."

'He hasn't responded to training - he still insists on taking Alec to his slippers....'

"We've now got a higher approval rating than the media."

'Ain't no lonelier life than being a free-range chicken boy.'

Kisses--Sniff Your A-hole.

'Still no Christmas card from the Pope? - We did send HIM once, didn't we?'

Corona virus: "Wow, I seem to be getting lots of attention lately."

'I think cowboys are just plain lazy: Why else would you have to carry them all the time?'

'If you must laugh, will you do it in the humour section please?'

'The hair plugs are that noticeable, huh?'

"Here's the problem. Your computer isn't obsolete, you are."

Keyboard in Heaven

Rudolph unblocking a chimney

"You've got to admit, he wears the 'that dog won't hunt' label with a lot of class!"

Man sees line of priests entering Mass Transit Authority.

Jesus Seals the Hick...

'You know you haven't been good, and I know you haven't been good, but good, nevertheless, is your public stance.'

"Or was it: 'Bubble, bubble, TOIL and trouble?'"

"Gesundheit!"

'Get with it, buddy -- that mile of highway you adopted has snow all over it!'

"Pandemic! That's a pretty name."

'Bless you!'

"What's all this I've been hearing about the Cloud?"

"You have a very long fault line. That's why your hands are trembling."

"I keep getting into a flap."

"I'm installing a backup camera. I'm tired of you sending me out to repair all the chimneys you back into."

Yoga - moooooooo.

All Day Parking $1. Leave keys. It may be necessary to move your car to a more convenient spot.

J-J-JOE'S B-B-BAR, 'Actually, Joe's done pretty well for a guy with a speech impediment.'

"He thinks you're playing fetch."