Sneakerhead Strategist Pillows

"This will help us stay one step ahead of the bank regulators."

Chez Nous Menu

Little league world series of poker.

"Tia Carmen, is it okay if my study group meets here tomorrow?"

"I can't decide. I'm having a brand identity crisis."

To do before Saturday...

"This was a wicked-hard test. I'm pretty sure everybody got a bad grade."

You're next, Mr. Kimble - right after his apple danish.

'Seven layers in one dip? Gentlemen, what have we wrought?'

Jeff's Smorgasbord

Man opens refrigerator which promptly burps.

'Top of the line sport shoes: They've improved my top speed by 0.5 kmh...'

"Wait, I'll go down with you. I'm just changing back into my rubber-soled actionwear."

"How come in these days of downsizing and lower expectations, all these sneakers come with ridiculously long laces?"

Thunk! Teddy! Pick them up! They're toxic to all living things! Ok. Ok. But you don't have to exaggerate. Regrettably � I'm not.

Maria had always said you could never have too many shoes. Actually, she was wrong.

"Sir, I have a question that's lunch-related."

"The most obvious side-effect of having a chip implanted in my brain is a constant craving for onion dip."

Running shoes? You have the wrong idea about "fasting," Brother Ernest!

Making healthy eating bearable.

'The meaning of life is to get a nice sneaker contract.'

"Do you have a shoe for roaming and prowling?"

Shoe Repair and Pest Control.

Randolph maintains a stiff upper lip while the rest of him just goes to hell.

"Would you like something by an over promoted high-price athlete or a nobody from Jersey?"

"We know you have better treats than raisins...we hacked your supermarket loyalty card."

'It must be love if your sneakers melted!'

Casting out the Shoe Devil.

"Yeah. I'm into fitness. Fittin' dis whole sammich in my mouth."

'We live in a designer trainer.'

"Got to have a pair of those!"

'... And for $50 more, this is the same basketball shoe in a turbo model.'

'Can we move the beef jerky a smidge and display our organic cleanser?'

"Wingtips--this is a white collar gang."

'She's on the rotation diet. Every time I turn around she's eating something.'