Snack Sneak Gifts

"I bought him noise cancelling headphones so he doesn't hear when we open the refrigerator."

Patisserie: He'll never know.

The wonderful world of cheese.

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

Vending machine: NO stress, only 50 cents.

Secretive Weigh In.

Honest Vending

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

"I'm afraid it's not cheese, it's 'cheese-like'."

"Nice try, Mom, but I'm going to go with a caterer."

"Tragic case of having the fridge from the TV when the World Cup is showing."

"My parents won't allow sugar in the house, so I've had to learn about it on the street."

"Works every time."

"Quick swig first?"

"To lose weight they said I've just had to give up two things. . .food and drink!"

"I like to use new Bible words. Let's beseech Mom for cookies."

"You're really not too extreme, huh?"

'...And as suburban sprawl continues to grow, many people are finding themselves living uncomfortably close to their wildlife neighbors.'

Fishing rod coming out of a health farm towards a hot dog stand.

In prehistoric times, there were hunters, gatherers and guys who never had change.

"Whoa! One last doughnut left."

Student Food Pyramid

Bill stumbles upon an automated taco maker.

"Do you want fries with that?"

"You complete me."

The Pope getting a Popsicle for Popes from the Freezer

Romulus and Remus and the Vending Machine

"Don't make me resort to alternative questioning techniques."

"So which one of you pesky dogs stole the last cookie from the bottom of the jar?"

"It's a map to the vending machines."

Give me a child at seven and I will show you the MAN!

'Beer? Wassat then?'

"You want me to explain how there were two doughnuts in the larder and now there is only one? Easy, it was too dark in there to see the second one."

"Oh, there will be an investigation!"

Gym. Whatever weight I manage to lose here I always seem to find on my way home. Donuts.