Smoking Pillows

"Shall we join the ladies?"

'if you have to ask how much, you can't afford to influence a candidate.'

"Whatever isn't cigarette butts in there is Harold."

Man's dentures hold cigar.

"It's just a fact of life that sometimes bad things happen to good cigars."

'I don't know what you're complaining about. I should charge you for breathing my second hand smoke. This happens to be a very expensive Cuban cigar!'

"If it's just the one after dinner I don't mind."

'Most of your support comes from short, bald, cigar smoking, fat men.'

Oversized Cigar

'I need a plane I can fly high enough each day to smoke my cigars without offending anyone.'

"Ahhh, the Cubans know the kind of treats to leave out for Santa on a cold winter's night."

"If we're done grousing about Cuba, let's have in to those cigars."

'I've cut down to one a day.'

Havana Cigars Limited

'It's not you, it's your carbon footprint.'

Man can't reach to light huge cigar.

'Is this the smoking area?'

'Do you think we should tell him that it takes more than a Churchillian cigar to make him inspirational'

"The tooth has to come out anyway, no reason why we can't have a little fun."

'Globalization never did me any harm.'

"Are you smoking or jumping?"

'Not for me thanks, mate - I'm only a passive smoker.'

"I'll keep thinking inside the box as long as they let me smoke in the box."

'and you promise not to run off, right?'

"I see, Mr. Pipkins, we're back on the bourbon and smoking through glazed doughnuts."

"You smell like a chimney."

'Wot next ? ---one out of the 'SMOKING SHORTENS YOUR LIFE' packet or shall we give 'SMOKING KILLS' a go ?'

"Must I really go outside to smoke?"

Turkey smoking a hookah.

'True, money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cognac, fine cigars and the company of beautiful women, and these make me very happy indeed.'

Smoking area

Old men,"I have terrible trouble with my joints..the cannabis keeps falling out."

'Would you please ask the people at the other tables to stop coughing.' (smokers)

'NO. Tobacco plants do NOT count as one of your 5 vegetable portions'

"Smoking or non-smoking?"