
'Hi John, it's your partner, Peter. I've decided to have a non-smokers day off - it should just make up for all the cigarette breaks you've taken in the last month!'
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'Hi John, it's your partner, Peter. I've decided to have a non-smokers day off - it should just make up for all the cigarette breaks you've taken in the last month!'
"It's not me smoking! It's that a**hole!"
"We don't care about his nose. We won't let him play because he's not vaccinated and won't wear a mask!"
"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"
"Welcome to Mars. We assume you're all up to date on your vaccinations?"
Welcome to Hell - No Smoking
"Hey, way to go! You invented both the disease AND the cure!"
"I suppose you heard about the crazy smoker who wound in a menthol hospital?"
Give up Smoking!
No Goldfishing. A-hem!
"Have a cigar. Go ahead - they're bubblegum."
'Are you crazy! The nest is made of dry grass and twigs: Smoking is a massive fire harzard!'
'You'll never convince me that phone masts aren't a health risk.'
The Republican View of Healthcare
Smokers.
"We're incompatible. . . He's anti-mask and I'm anti-vax!"
'Isn't it bad for you?...no I haven't managed to light one yet!'
'. . . I go like dude, second hand smoke is so uncool!. . .So now he's filed a complaint with the condo committee that my musings penetrate his walls and he's suffering from second hand thought!'
Smoking jackets outide menswear shop
'So NOW there's universal health care!'
The Marlboro Journal of Medicine: Making a Killing Off of Cigarettes
Lighting it will kill you.
'But Darling, how can it possibly be bad for me? I only smoke a couple a day...'
Horse De-wormer Saves Live!
'We need a birth ban, too, because every life ends fatally!'
Indignitas - 'How dare you help me take my life!'
'Son, be honest. Are you taking EPO?'
Custer objects to passive smoking, and immediately launches the west into another great Indian war.
'Personally I can't (cough!) see the point of a no smoking policy .' ' Who (cough) said that?'
"I said. . . opening the economy now with the Covid 19 cases on the increase is just too risky. . . hello. . . ? Hello . . . ? Anybody there. . . ?"
'However, I must warn you. The surgeon general reports smoking may be harmful to your health.'
An ostrich with its head buried, smoking under the sand, next to a No Smoking sign.
'...now they want to tax to death one thing that gives people pleasure.'
Two men in a carriage
At a drive-thru - 'Do you mind getting rid of that disgusting cigarette sir?!'
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