Smoke Ring Champion Gifts

'I wasn't supposed to stay, but then I got hooked on these things.'

Pipe Smoker of the Year Awards.

Of pitting his own wits against their natural cunning

'Do you want us to wait till the meat is completely burned or can we call the pizza service right now?'

'You are talking about health? Ha! My cig does not have calories, fat, cholesterol, carbohydrates and sugar!'

'I'm so proud of you sweetie, you haven't smoked for a week!'

Alpine Pipe

Thanks to hypnosis, he quit smoking cold-turkey. Everyone seemed real supportive until he came strutting into work, half-naked, gobbling incoherently.

George can overreact when people criticise his barbecues.

Talking about smoking to a therapist who is a smoker.

The Grim Rapper

Dog show success

Peace pipe or non?

"Well, I guess that settles that."

How the Magic Dragon got the Knickname 'Puff'.

'Do you think we should tell him that it takes more than a Churchillian cigar to make him inspirational'

"It's Ok, I'm not working!!"

'Now, cut that out!'

'Three hearts.'

Global Warming

Will the last person to quit smoking please empty the ashtray!

Vicar blowing smoke halo.

Scientist chides lab dogs for smoking.

'Strong bit of cheese that.'

One Novel Pony

'Now remember - one of those cigarettes in the pack contains the cyanide capsule.'

'Smoking is dangerous, you know.'

'Yeah. . . but it really helped me quit smoking.'

'It took her three months to quit smoking and five years to quit talking about quitting.'

No Smoking/second hand smoke kills.

Smoke from sheep's pipe is like fluffy wool

"Before you put on a nicotine patch you need to take off the old one."

"I understand your machine makes O-rings."

'This is fun, Dad -- I'm in a flame war with Vladimir Putin!'

"God I miss the good old days when you could huff and puff anywhere you damn well pleased."